Find the podcast on:
-What does codependency look like with coaches, mentors, and gurus?
-What can go wrong when you rely too much on a coach?
-How can you focus on your inner work to ultimately decide what is best for you? (rather than continuing to rely on the advice of others)
Welcome to Episode 140! This week, Dr. Rima Bonario is back for her third interview! During our time together, we took an in-depth look at what codependency can look like with coaches, mentors, gurus (really any authority figure). As a coach, Rima sheds light on what codependency can look like as a participant/mentee/student: leaving your brain at the door. She describes the good and bad of being codependent with a coach, the long-term consequences, and what codependents can be mindful of to avoid an over-reliance on mentors. We conclude with Rima’s advice on how to focus on our inner work to avoid so much outer dependence on others. It’s a must-listen.
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More on this week’s guest:
Dr. Rima Bonario is a Dream Weaver, Soul-Coach and Wild-Heart Healer who draws from the culmination of 30 years of her own evolution to help women experience personal wholeness, relationship harmony, and material abundance in their lives.
Medicine, Magic, and Money 5-module course for FREE: https://www.thesevenqueendoms.net/money
More deets on the episode:
Rima is back for the 3rd time ya’ll! What a gift! We start off with hearing what codependency looks with coaches/mentors/gurus (and other authority figures!). Rima describes how, as a participant, codependency can look like: finding someone you resonate with and concluding “this person has all the answers.” She describes how codependents will “leave our brain at the door” and potentially make decisions that our coach wants, however, are out of alignment with our ultimate goals.
We hear how Rima has observed codependency in herself as well as her coaching clients. She describes how, culturally, we love the “expert” archetype. However, if we are not careful, we neglect to think critically about their advice/input/teaching and do things that don’t work for us. Rima emphasizes how we must balance our lineage and gnosis.
Rima highlights how codependents are vulnerable to vertical and horizontal worship in coaching settings: we worship our coach while attempting to please our peers. “This soothes us but it is a trap.” Ultimately, blind codependency with a coach/mentor/guru can lead us to spend money excessively on their programs, feeling more confused about our direction, relying on outer guidance excessively, and poor self-esteem.
How can we avoid codependency with coaches/mentors/gurus? Rima suggests “taking your ‘no’ with you,” taking time for inner wisdom/guidance, practicing self-forgiveness and self-compassion, knowing your goals, and inhabiting ease.
Rima spells out initial steps to cultivating our inner work, including a focus on being over doing, affirmations, attributing our success to ourselves, using mistakes as teaching moments, co-creating with others (like coaches), and working through a place of ease.
Thanks for coming on Rima! And thank you for listening, my dear listener!
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-The Self-Validation Challenge – free 30-day guide to providing yourself with all the validation you seek: http://www.codependummy.com/challenge
-Get your copy of the Confiding Codependummy: 30 days of journaling prompts for a less-codependent and more-conscious you! http://www.codependummy.com/toolsforhealing
-If you are wanting to dive into your codependency deeper one-on-one, please email firstname.lastname@example.org to work with me!
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See you next week!
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