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Why am I so terrified to speak up?
What gets in the way of codependents being able to speak our truth?
How can you start to speak up when you need to through awareness, acceptance, and action?
In this week’s episode, we will be unpacking why we codependents are so terrified of speaking up! With the use of Karen McMohan’s Coaching Technique, I will help you reflect on your own terror to speak up and empower you to start to squeak, whisper, state, proclaim, or YELL whatever it is that you need to rather than live in that terror-ridden state. You will have a step-by-step way to reflect on when you stay silent in hopes that it will help you speak up next time. It’s a must-listen!
Helpful links:
http://www.codependummy.com/toolsforhealing – check out The Confiding Codependummy for just $1 a day for the next month (it’s $30 total).
http://www.codependummy.com – check out the Self-Validation Challenge for free!
More deets on today’s episode:
Why am I so terrified to speak up?
Let’s look at the who, what, when, where, why, and how of a recent situation when I was unable to speak up due to my codependency.
Who: I was terrified to speak up to my therapist
What: We were in session and it felt like he wasn’t listening, like he was distracted, like he was multitasking.
When: Saturday, January 22 at 12pm. More like 12:25pm.
Where: We meet via telehealth.
How: How come?I just sat there wondering, worrying, and wanting to say something and I couldn’t do it. I could not say “Doctor, you seem distracted. Can you give me your undivided attention?”
Why: I couldn’t do it. I even thought to myself, “I can’t. I can’t do it. I know that I need to. Part of me wants to. Oh, maybe now? No. How much time left? Come on, Marissa. You can do this. Nope, nope can’t say it. Won’t say it. We will go on forever as therapist and patient and I will never, ever say it.”
We then apply Karen’s process: awareness, acceptance, and action!
In every moment/situation, you can ask yourself, in doing or not doing something, is this a fear-based decision or desire-based decision?
Conclusion: It’s okay to speak up. It’s terrifying but living a life of not speaking up is also terrifying.
Homework for you: apply the steps!
Take it situation by situation
What happened? The context. Who, what, when, where, why, and how?
Awareness: what is/are the codependent behaviors and patterns you’re falling into?
Acceptance: how can you express self-acceptance towards yourself and these behaviors?
Action: by becoming conscious, aware, having insight: how can I choose to honor myself and make a desire-based decision?
Outcome: It’s all good information.
THE END!
http://www.codependummy.com/toolsforhealing
Marissa’s info:
@therapywithmarissa on IG
http://www.therapywithmarissa.com
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