In Part I, we discuss how you have been raised to be codependent

How have you been set up to be codependent by your family, authority figures, and the education system.

Be sure to listen to Part II and Part III to hear about ways you have been reinforced and rewarded to be codependent!

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In This Podcast episode:

  • Marissa walks through ways your family, society, teachers, and other authority figures raised you to put the needs of others above your own.
  • You’ll get details and examples to help you build awareness of how you have been raised to be codependent in your own life no matter where you are from or what type of family you had
  • You’re invited to reflect and think critically about the messages you received about what it meant to be a “good girl” growing up
  • We start to normalize rather than pathologize your codependency–since you were set up to be this way. You are not crazy!

Helpful links:

Very Well Mind – What is codependency?

Diagnostic Criteria for Codependency – Timmen Cermak

Timmen Cermak – Wikipedia page

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What is codependency? In this episode, we discuss Timmen Cermak’s definition that he created around 1986. He talks about five essential features of codependency, one of them being “the assumption of responsibility of meeting others needs to the exclusion of meeting one’s own needs.”

Isn’t that motherhood? OR RATHER–is that fatherhood? Let’s break it down:

  1. Assumption of responsibility
  2. For meeting others needs
  3. To the exclusion of
  4. Acknowledging one’s own needs

Marissa provides real-life examples of ways she was raised to be codependent. She also discusses ways she has seen it in other young women who were raised to put the needs of others above their own starting from a young age.

Do you remember times when adults used guilt to make you feel bad about who you were, what you did, or what you said? What did those times teach you about speaking your mind, asserting your feelings, and maintaining boundaries?

Ask yourself: What’s a time when you really learned that your needs are not as important as other people’s needs?How have you been raised to believe that you are responsible for other people’s needs? And how were you raised to put your own needs aside?

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