In Part I, we discussed how you have been raised to be codependent.

In Part II, we will look at how you have been reinforced to put the needs of others above your own.

How have you been set up to be codependent through the encouragement, modeling, and reinforcement from others.

Be sure to listen to Part I and Part III to hear about ways you have been raised and rewarded to be codependent!

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In This Podcast episode:

Marissa walks through ways you were encouraged, reinforced, and cheered on to please others–as it relates to her body.
You’ll get details and examples to help you build awareness of how you have been reinforced to be codependent in your own life from your parents, authority figures, and even your friends!
You’re invited to reflect and think critically about the messages you received from others about what it meant when you were self-sacrificing and prioritized others above yourself.
We start to normalize rather than pathologize your codependency–since you were set up to be this way. You are not crazy!
Helpful links:

Social Pressures Often Reinforce Codependency

Interactions in Relationships: Codependency vs. Positive Reinforcement

The Common Thread Between Food Addiction and Codependency

How Food Addiction & Codependency Go Hand in Hand

Want to work with me? Go to

What is codependency and how does it manifest other ways? In this episode, we look at Karen Horney’s definition of codependency as: “a magical belief that they will find an answer to life through others.” Marissa talks about how she was often reinforced to please others through her body. She discusses how she became “body conscious,” meaning hyper-concious and self-conscious of her body in order to get others approval, attention, and affection.

How has your body, weight, and relationship with food been dependent on the like, love, and approval from others?

Marissa provides real-life examples of ways she was reinforced to be codependent as it relates to her weight–since she wanted others to like her so she figured she needed to stay small. She also discusses ways she has seen it in other young women who were reinforced to please others by maintaining a small body.

Do you remember times when adults provided you messages about how they liked you for your beauty? Your brains? Your body? Your thoughtfulness? Your consideration?

Ask yourself: What’s a time when you really learned that you could please others by looking pretty? Being smart? Maintaining a small frame? Getting everything done on time? Cleaning the house? How did you learn to get the love you were pining for by meeting the expectations of others?

Also, we look at the rules that codependents follow where they hold themselves to a higher, almost impossible standard out of feelings of unworthiness.

How has your codependency shown up in different ways? How does it manifest? What do you sense is underneath your symptoms and negative coping skills?

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