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-What is “work-life balance” and why is it so foreign to codependents?
-What does imbalance tend to look like in codependents in work and life?
-How can we begin to cultivate balance in our lives?
Welcome to Episode 136! This week, I sat down with Naketa Ren Thigpen, Balance and Relationship Advisor, to talk all about work-life balance. We take an in-depth look into what it looks like to have imbalance in your life and the long-term consequences of an imbalanced life. Naketa shares her balance formula and how she helps individuals and couples focus on a) the truth of what they want and b) boundaries to make that truth happen. We explore how codependents can tune out the noise to get in touch with what they want and set boundaries aligned with their needs. We conclude with hearing about Naketa’s own work-life balance and how she combats being codependent with her own clients. It’s a must-listen!
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More on this week’s guest:
Naketa Ren Thigpen is the #1 Balance (and) Relationship Advisor in the World, activating power couples and potent humans who privately identify with witty tongue-in-cheek humor as lazy overachievers. The intersection of work life balance, sustainable business, mental health, and fulfilling relationships is where Naketa thrives at work and in real life. She’s marking her legacy of unbound brilliance, beauty, and balance with unapologetic insights on owning the right to be intentionally selfish by leveraging micro sabbaticals that empower you to work less and trust more.
More deets on the episode:
We begin with hearing Naketa’s definition of codependency: prioritizing someone over yourself. She distinguishes how codependency varies from the unhealthiest to the healthiest version (i.e., giving priority to a child in the moment).
Naketa opens up about codependency in her own life with her mother. She recalls how she was codependent with the “potential and possibility” of her mother who struggled with mental illness, substance use, and unhealthy patterns like parentifying Naketa when she was a teen. Naketa describes how this codependent dynamic that she had with her mother repeated in her friendships, professional life, and in her marriage.
We shift focus to Naketa’s specialty: BALANCE. What does work-life imbalance tend to look like in codependents? Naketa describes how balance is comprised of work, life, and love. When there is imbalance, an individual is not choosing themself–even for a small amount of time. With imbalance, one experiences their energy being sucked by others, saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” and fulfilling the needs of others while neglecting your own.
Naketa educates us on her balance formula: T / B. T = the Truth of what you want. B = Boundaries expansive enough to hold space for what you want.
But what if codependents struggle to identify their Truth? Or once they have it, they hesitate to create those Boundaries? Naketa details exercises she does with her clients to help them find out what they want related to their “heir” and what they are passing on. She also describes an exercise where she asks: Who is in your kitchen? Through the use of metaphor, Naketa helps her clients decide who they are most intimate with in their “kitchen” and “at their table” compared to those “out in the parking lot.”
We conclude by hearing about how Naketa continues to combat codependency with her clients and how she deliberately sets limits to model healthy boundaries for them. Through walking the talk, Naketa empowers her clients to create the same types of boundaries and promote work-life balance.
Thanks for coming on Naketa! And thank you for listening, my dear listener!
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